I Don’t Want to Get Hurt, So I’ll Max Out My Defense

Chapter 172: 173 Immortal Spirit Daily

Translator: 549690339

Every day on the Immortal Spirit Continent, extraordinary and unusual events occur, giving rise to a special kind of reading material—the Immortal Spirit Daily.

It is said that the Immortal Spirit Daily was created by Elder Tianji, a top expert from the Central Province. Elder Tianji can glimpse into the secrets of heaven. He is well-versed in astronomy and geography and is the wisest person on the continent.

With special methods, he is able to learn about most events occurring across the mainland. Every day, he records these events and compiles them into the Immortal Spirit Daily for distribution.

Over time, this Immortal Spirit Daily has become an important channel for cultivators to stay informed about worldly affairs.

After all, being founded by the second-ranked expert on the Heavenly List, its authority and impartiality are beyond doubt.

Now, Li Xiaobai had such a newspaper in his hands. With so many events having recently occurred, and having become famous himself, he needed to see if there was any important information.

Today’s headline: “Unrest arises again in the Northern Region; Flesh Mountain fully revives, a great calamity is imminent!”

This news came from the Tianbei Secret Realm. According to Elder Tianji, the heart-shaped Flesh Mountain had not died that day but had escaped using a secret technique. At the same time, all the suppressed Flesh Mountains across the Immortal Spirit Continent showed signs of awakening, warning cultivators not to venture into these remote frontier lands.

To think that Flesh Mountain was actually so powerful that not even the Mahayana Realm’s Heavenly Tribulation managed to obliterate it outright. However, it seemed to be wounded and likely wouldn’t emerge for some time.

Continuing to browse, Li Xiaobai found quite a bit of information about himself.

“Sword Imprisonment, the Demon’s Wicked Sword emerges in the Northern Region, slaying over a thousand geniuses in a single day, soaring up the ranks by nine thousand places!”

“Demon Sword Li Xiaobai captures geniuses from various factions of the Central Province, powerful forces call out across the distance, demanding the release of their disciples and sons within three days or they will flatten the Northern Region!”

“The enigmatic figure of the Northern Region, Ou Yezi, performs a blood sacrifice of hundreds of strong individuals in a single day, forcefully breaking through to the Mahayana Realm cultivation level, elevating the Holy Demon Sect from mediocrity!”

“…”

The report was well-written, vivid, delicate, moving, and profound.

Yet, its content made Li Xiaobai frown. Such secretive matters within the Secret Realm could not be kept hidden from Elder Tianji; everything was exposed.

Even Ou Yezi’s acts of trapping and blood-sacrificing geniuses to break through were uncovered. There was no such thing as privacy. The force behind this Immortal Spirit Daily was indeed terrifying.

The rest of the report was filled with trivial matters, basically stuff like a certain sect’s fresh young talent starting to sell products live on air, hoping everyone would support the event.

At the end of the Immortal Spirit Daily, Li Xiaobai found a miniature Formation with a line of small characters beneath it.

Looking for extraordinary news, submissions welcome.

This was an audio transmission Formation which could be activated with a trace of Spiritual Power. Li Xiaobai took out a Spirit Stone, crushed it, and placed it on top of the Formation. Threads of Spiritual Power infiltrated the Formation, which emitted light, and the projection of an old man with a white beard appeared before Li Xiaobai.

This must be Elder Tianji, able to meet a vast audience in such a form—an advanced move indeed.

“Welcoming extraordinary news submissions, Old Man Tianji Zi here, at your sincere service.”

This was a strand of Elder Tianji’s Primordial Spirit Power, tasked specifically with collecting submission letters.

Without a second thought, Li Xiaobai said, “I am Li Xiaobai, and I wish to call out to the various powerful factions of the Central Province across the distance. Their disciples and sons are in my hands. If they want them to live, they must pay a ransom of one million high-grade Spirit Stones per person.”

After consideration, he had settled on this price, which he believed was within the limits of what these factions were willing to bear. High-grade Spirit Stones were not as rare as top-grade Spirit Stones and were not a scarcity.

The old man in front of him instantly perked up, nodding continuously. Clearly, he knew Li Xiaobai, and openly extorting the Central Province forces was most certainly big news.

“Not bad, not bad. Anything else you want to say?”

“Uh, that’s all for now. Please don’t exaggerate.”

Li Xiaobai felt that the old man enjoyed stirring up excitement and was a bit uneasy, so he reminded him, since being so bold was possible only because Ou Yezi was at the Mahayana Realm, and because the old beggar was on the mountain. In the next few days, he should find him and get him into shape; then, they could tie up those troublemakers and sell them for money.

“Alright, I welcome your next submission. If you provide major news ten times in a row, you can become a premium member of Immortal Spirit Daily. At that time, you will receive free benefits.”

Elder Tianji nodded and slowly disappeared.

…

Meanwhile.

In the latrine of Misty Peak.

Several captive prodigies looked sullen. The cultivators cleaning the latrine were working enthusiastically, covered in filth, yet their faces strangely brimmed with smiles.

“You can rest for the next couple of days. This batch of newbies is handed over to you. They are completely clueless, being new to the place, so teach them well,” Yuan Fang said indifferently.

“No problem, Senior Brother Yuan. I have been diligent and thrifty these days and have saved up another hundred points. Do you think I could possibly…” said one of the latrine-cleaning cultivators with a fawning face.

“Go on, go on, but only after you’ve properly guided the newcomers,” Yuan Fang said impatiently, waving his hand and leaving.

“Don’t worry, we will definitely get the job done!”

The men were excited and turned their eyes to appraise the captive prodigies, who were dressed extravagantly and carried themselves with an extraordinary air, clearly from reputable backgrounds.

They were likely disciples of some major power, and these seasoned laborers particularly enjoyed dealing with such disciples. To make these proud and rebellious geniuses face reality was an undeniable duty for them as menial workers.

“Are you guys new here?”

“Yes, yes, yes, Senior Brothers. We are disciples of Fire Qilin Cave from Central Province. We are new here and ask for your guidance. Here’s a little token of appreciation for you to accept with a smile,” Yunkun said cheerfully, taking out a few Spirit Stones he had earlier hidden in his shoes and handing them over.

“Don’t flash your status at me. It doesn’t work here, you know?”

After taking the Spirit Stones, the old cultivators’ faces softened considerably. Pointing to the latrine, they said, “From today on, you are responsible for cleaning this place. I’ll tell you some rules in advance to prevent you from being punished later.”

“Cleaning the latrine is a top priority within the sect. Only when the disciples feel comfortable in body and mind can they maintain a proper attitude to life. We, in the service industry, must do our best to avoid any mishaps.”

“Usually, no one carries a roll of tissue paper on them, so when there’s no paper in the latrine, we need to greet the disciples like a gentle spring breeze and resolve this issue for them promptly. This is the most common problem and the one that’s most likely to occur. Pay close attention to this.”

“Then, you must ensure that the cleaning of the latrine is thorough, including the entrance, the corners—these blind spots are the focus of rigorous cleaning and should not be neglected in the slightest. Got it?”

The seasoned cultivators explained all the details of cleaning the latrine, which were the accumulated experiences of their seniors, to the newbies with a stern expression.

Yunkun and the others knew they couldn’t avoid this tribulation; they pinched their noses and nodded, indicating their understanding.

“You novices are lucky, arriving late. You haven’t even seen the worst state of the latrines. Do a good job; I have high hopes for you…”