My Servant Is An Elf Knight From Another World

<<Heavy Rainstorms in Venice Sparks Paranoia>>

<<The Sludge. Natural Disaster? Or Maybe Something More?>>>

<<Memorial Gathering for Sludge Victims Postponed Due to Bad Weather>>

On and on with every swipe up my feed, one foreboding headline after the other... thought breakfast would be as good a time as any to keep myself updated with all the happenings happening outside the comfort of my bedroom walls.

Smartphones, the new wrinkly bundle of newspapers of the 21st century.

I do this everyday, took me until the third day to realize I really didn't have to. You read one article, and you've read them all. There's a pattern to this thing, you see - and once you start noticing it, everything starts reading like they're all written by the same person.

Sensationalist headliner to entice clicks. Stock photo with barely any relevance to the main topic. Three paragraphs worth of actually talking about said topic. Fill in the rest of the article with baseless facts that plays on an already anxious people anxiety under the guise of 'Speculation' and 'Presumptions'.

Classic journalism.

Despite the quote-unquote 'Sludge' being a first time never before seen phenomenon, somehow we already got a group of individuals parading themselves around as experts, giving their professional opinion on what the hell The Sludge actually was.

Thanks to them, now we got plenty of sides to choose and divide ourselves from. Some go the mad conspiracy route and say it was man-made, classic New World Order culling jet fuel steel beams combo. 

Others like themselves a good spooky tale to give themselves shivers and blame the supernatural, I'm sure phony mediums and psyhics aplenty are making good bank nowadays because of it. 

Last but not least, we got the crowd that scream out loud into the streets of a doomsday impending. The end is nigh and the Sludge was a clear sign of the end of times, and honestly I've never heard of something that can sound so stupid and so wrong, yet somehow also so right at the same time. Pretty amazing, actually.

Worst part? Our little town in the middle of nowhere here got plopped in the middle it all. Every article written, every video made... somehow it'll always circle back to how our town was the first to be struck and was also the only one where the sludge turned black.

Coincidence?!  They. Think. Not.

And they got the facts and logic to back it up to slam back at the haters.

Like the fact that preceding our Sludge, just weeks back, our town was plagued by serial abductions where the victims were found but had no memory of their abductees.

Well when people get to thinking like that, they get to talking like that, and the talk now was - 'Oh no, cultist ritual' 'Egad, Pagan Gods!'

Which, yeah... I used to have a chuckle reading and watching these kinds of things.

But now their claims just hit too close for comfort... the next time a conspiracy like this sprouts up out of nowhere, don't think I'd be chuckling just as light.

Luckily we got some memes out of it too.

Favourite was one was a post with a picture of heaven, and since the Sludge kinda looks like oil, we got the military kicking in the pearly gates.

My sense of humor is good.

Was done with breakfast just as I finished watching a video of some guy on a sofa, looking sullen at the camera while sighing loudly every five minutes.

Not exactly a film critic but if I had a say, <<My Story: How I Survived the Sludge>>  didn't really that many mid-roll ads as it did, just saying.

End of the video, he claimed he'll be taking a roadtrip and will start vlogging in our town to reveal to us guys the 'truth'.

Oh well, if there was any silver lining at all to this, I guess tourism in our area has skyrocketed quite dramatically. So yay for clout.

The moment I set my fork aside, and wiped my lips with a napkin, Adalia was already there at my beck and call, at the ready to get me up on my feet.

Didn't really want to admit it, but I seriously felt like I'm in an old folks center with the amount of things I needed a helping hand with.

Luckily I'm still shower-abled, so luckily, or unluckily depending on how you view it, there won't be any spongebath scrubbings from a vampire Matriarch just yet.

So... hurray?

After a quick careful shower, I got dressed for the day and began my rehabilitation routine for the day.

You got your normal morning jog down the block, but in the case of my affliction, my route is just a tad bit shorter.

The hallway. From one end to the other. Five times. Easy peasy. Did it in a breeze.

Next up, same route, five times, this time in a light sprint. Not as easy peasy. Struggled a bit this time.

Right after, with legs already sore, I have to clamber my way down the stairs. For some reason, inclines were my kryptonite... so its a toughy, this one.

"Do you want... to hold my... hand?"

Took me a while to notice Adalia's outstretched arm. Prepping yourself in your head kinda blocks everything else out.

I gave her a look. "Isn't that cheating?"

"You hold... Ash's..." She said softly.

"Yeah, well... that was," I gave another look. "Different?"

"Different," She tilted her head, blinking blankly. "How...?"

"Well..." I trailed away.

Seriously this girl has a thing for getting me to squirm. It's not her, it's just... you know?

Those nails were still as jagged and sharp as ever...

"Oh..." Adalia said, just noticing where my gaze went. "I'm... sorry..."

She curled away that claw, lowered away that hand.

"I forgot..."

Wish I could too.

Eventually, I did manage to find my way down after much balancing and gasping for breath, unassisted, might I add.

Probably no big deal for those still frolicking in the springtime of youth, but for me it was like traversing Mount Everest while legless and also on a wheelchair.

"Still... not... there..." Adalia muttered, effortlessly coming down after me. "Front door..."

"I know," I said, hands on trembling knobbly kness. "Going now..."

This was the price to pay for overexertion. Doctor Detective says I'll be struggling the better part of the month before I get better, before my hands will ever be able to touch that door.

I say - give me two weeks.

Week and a half later, here I was, halfway down the hallway, raising every step forward like it was my last, felt like it, anyway...

"Almost... there..." Adalia said, standing by for me right at the finish line. "Don't... give up... please..."

Please, huh? Well, they do say those were the magic words... and again, how can you ever deny when she's making a face like that?

One last spurt of energy in me, and I realized I'm just draining it going slow and steady.

So I changed my tactics. I cannonball'd it. Like a crumpled paper airplane thrown to the breeze, I zig-zag left-right wobble-stumble the rest of the way forward.

Doing that, three things were made readily apparent.

Number one, I actually ran through the entire hallway, the front door just barely within reach now.

Number two, thanks to my banzai hail mary sprint, I can't control my damn arms or legs anymore.

Number three, I'm about to pancake-smash my face agaisnt the damn door.

"Uh oh."

My last words. I'm such a poet.

Closed my eyes, and just accepted the fact that my fate had just been sealed. By my hand, no less.

Before I die from brutal facepalming, I just wanna clarify that the blame lies solely on no one but I.

I'm my own damn Grim Reaper.

I braced myself for the sudden stop. Expected to hear the tumultuous boom of solid wood. And pain too, oh boy, a tidal wave of unbearable agony to drown in all just for me.

There it was - the sudden stop... I stopped... but the boom never came. Then I felt something stung, something sharp and I immediately fluttered my eyes open and whirled around.

"Are you... okay?" Adalia asked, genuine concern swirling in her misty white eyes.

"I'm okay," I said, still feeling that painful sting. I pretended I didn't. "That was close though."

"Yes..." The stinging finally stopped. Adalia finally let go of my hand. "But... you did it... you... finally did...'

"Yeah, not even two weeks," I let out a wheezy chuckle, as I sunk my hands to the side. "I think your breakfast might have something to do with it."

Adalia rose her brows. "Really....?"

I nodded, beaming wide. "Couldn't make it before. I made it now. That can't be a coincidence."

A quiet sigh, her lips faintly curled upwards. "So... do you feel... better now?"

I slowly inched my hand behind my back, keeping it balled up into fist, ignoring the warmth slowly trickling  down from my palm, where the stinging pain flared once more.

"Yep," I exclaimed, smiling wide. "Never feltbetter."

Her lips curled even more. "That's good... I'm... glad..."

It continued to trickle, my hand continued to sting.

Thought maybe I could hide it, thought she didn't have to know, you know?

Then I heard her take a sniff.

Should have known already I couldn't possibly hide it, that in the end, she always finds out.

Adalia's perceptive like that.

Suddenly, her lips stopped curling, and the whites in her eyes stopped their distant dreamy stare.

"Oh..." She stepped away from me. "I didn't... mean... to..."

"No, no... come on," I shook my head. "It's doesn't even hurt, I'm okay,"

She squeezed her hand. "Yes... it does..."

I squirmed. "Only a little..."

Even without her expression I knew she didn't believe me. A vampire like her, she knows her extents and she knows her limits...

And from the small sigh she blew... I guess it didn't seem like only a little.

"Next... exercise... soon..." She said quietly. "I... won't touch you... anymore... I promise..."

It kept dripping. I felt it sprinkle at my feet.

"I'll go... find... bandages..."

And with that, she glumly walked away... I wish I could follow her, but it just wasn't that easy.

Why can't everything just be that easy?