The Unnamed God. I'm really Not a God You Guys!

Chapter 285: Match Made in Heaven!

*CRASH* 

Seems the glass wasn't sturdy enough. 

I blame that shoddy craftsmanship. 

I fell on some kind of table. 

A stone one. 

There are stone fragments all over the place. 

Whatever was on it is now destroyed to pieces, completely beyond recognition. 

As I look around, I can see a well-lit room. 

Lots of people all staring at me. 

Judging by the dcor this seems like some high society event. 

One that I totally just crashed by mistake. 

This is awkward. 

I need to somehow talk them into forgiving me. 

Greetings, then pay for the damage I caused.

After that, I'll be on my way. 

Best case they'll forgive me too.

Alright, I got this. 

[Good night, isn't it?] 

There is a moment of silence. 

Everyone too shocked to make a peep. 

I'm just here waiting for a reaction. 

A man starts stomping on the ground. 

Aging, relatively stylish. 

An air of authority to him. 

Now he is pointing at me. 

"You scoundrel! HOW DARE YOU!" 

Okay, he's really mad. 

"Who are you! What give you the guts to!" 

[First of all, I'm sorry. Second, I didn't mean to. I just fell.] 

"You fell?! You'll make me believe you simply fell?! You were clearly scheming against our family!" 

How do I defend myself? 

C'mon think logically. 

[No, I don't even know who you or your family are.]

He turns red. 

"Funny aren't you hehe." 

[No, I really mean it!] 

Do I look like the type to joke around? 

No way! 

"You barge in here, destroy this peaceful atmosphere, trash the gods' altar. Then you dare look down on us!" 

[No I never meant to] 

"Good. Very good kid. Some don't know how to spell the word death. Do you believe yourself to be above judgment!" 

This is getting out of hand. 

[How about I pay for the damage and]

"Backing down, are you? Very wealthy, are you?"

[Not especially actually. Ah, but I should receive some gold soon enough.] 

"Men close the exits! Then go get the city enforcement!" 

Should I just run? 

"Thinking about escaping, are you? It is too late! Everyone here has seen your face already!" 

Yeah, that is right. 

Now I regret not getting the same clothes as that one guy I saw on my roof. 

I could have just left. 

Funny how I was judging him for the dagger but forgot about anonymity myself. 

If I become a wanted man, I will lose everything. 

The bakery, my friends here. 

I and Wolfie would also need to live like fugitives. 

I'm pretty sure I can't fight a whole city head-on. 

I could pull the same trick I did in the Moon Keep.

First, try and talk my way out. 

If that doesn't work, I'll let them capture me and I'll escape. 

When they let their guard down that is. 

I have never fought here. 

There is no way they know about my powers. 

I'll get a low-security cell for sure. 

I'm pretty sure of it. 

A city wouldn't just waste resources on a nobody. 

Especially if the crime is just breaking a window and a tableoh wait an altar. 

Is that a broken hammer? 

Who uses that on an altar?! 

One day I'll see these guys in a hardware store just praying. 

Perhaps.

"Father how about we try and resolve this peacefully?" 

The one that talked just now is a plain-looking lady in a red dress. 

Hey, at least she has magnanimity! 

I just want to thank her right now haha. 

"As if we would take this insult lying down!" 

Judging by his tone that is a categoric no. 

Never mind. 

She tried at least. 

Before long, the doors open wide. 

Enters an annoyed-looking lady that is quickly heading over. 

"Why did you guys need my help exactly? I have investigations duties left. Make it quick!" 

I feel like I've met her somewhere before. 

Ah, right! 

She was the one hovering around my friend from Gluto. 

"This villain interrupted the wedding of both of our families! He destroyed the sacred altar used for"

"Gotcha. Guess I'll just take him away and.ah, it's you!" 

[*Wave* Hey there.] 

"Why are you here in the first place?!" 

[I was doing some parkour.] 

"What kind of shady practice is that?" 

[Eh, you just move around the city quickly is all.]

"Why?" 

[Because it's fun. I simply didn't expect the ceiling to be that frail.] 

She looks at me in disbelief. 

"Let me get this straight you were running on the roof and fell?" 

[Exactly!] 

"Don't listen to his lies! There is no way anyone would do that!" 

She shakes her head.

"That man is a friend of Gluto. Don't expect common sense from anyone related to him." 

I can hear exclamations once she says that. 

The man continues. 

"Then I believe them to be voluntarily targeting us! The last time we had to reschedule the wedding because of the commotion the follower from Gluto caused! Now, this lowlife is interrupting again!" 

What is he even going on about? 

[Brother, I really don't know who you are. Not in the least.]

"He is lying!" 

[I didn't even know this was a wedding in the first place.] 

"Lies! All lies!"

[Can't we get a truth bell in here or something?] 

The city enforcement lady sighs. 

"These aren't that common. Not every family owns one. This case is not big enough for me to request one either."

Oh damn. 

Don't tell me that one-time use bell was actually valuable? 

Guess I'll apologize next time. 

But now I need to deal with this situation. 

Ah, I know! 

I turn to what I assume to be the groom. 

He doesn't look groom-like at all, but maybe it's a cultural difference. 

[Hey, there are you the one getting married?] 

He nods. 

[Look I'm really sorry about all this!] 

I look between him and the lady at his arm. 

They seem extremely lovey-dovey. 

[You guys look like a match made in heaven! I wish you the best in your marital life. I also wish for you guys to forgive me.] 

There is a moment of silence. Better add even more. 

I turn to the lady in red. 

[Please help me convince your brother.] 

She gives a helpless sigh. 

"I'm actually the bride, the one at his arm is a prostitute." 

Motherfucker! 

*SLAP* 

Ah, I somehow couldn't help myself. 

Slapped him right on in the face. 

Real hard. 

What kind of human trash brings a prostitute to his own wedding?!